This is it.
Those words sifted through my mind more than once today.
My family’s gone, off home. Or, I guess I am “home,” now, so… they went back to Gowanda.
Cool. I’m by my lonesome. Independent, isn’t that the right word?
But I don’t feel alone, and that’s totally not in a creeptastic way, either. I’m just comforted right now, even though I’m sitting by myself in my 2x2ft dorm. There is a lingering sadness, I’m not going to lie. Meesh and my parents are going to arrive back at the house to the constant obnoxious noise of the balding Grizzwald and also to my ugly cat. They’re going to maybe stop and eat on the way there and talk about their day.
I, on the other hand, will go downstairs to eat dinner with my big sib at 5, then to more meeting and an ice cream social (oh, yeah) until potentially 10:30.
It’s going to be a late night, I’ve never (ahhh, gasp!) showered in public (if that’s how we want to phrase that beaut) before, and I have to be up and at a location at 8:30 am tomorrow.
But shit, I’m on my own. Well, with God. But making my own moves, here. Like in the computer chess I’ve been obsessed with lately, the computer manipulates me to do what it wants. I learn from it, but I am not making my own moves.
Consider me making the decisions now. Let’s see whatcha got, Rochester.