Psychosis

Here’s the definition for it; it’s not just taking up space as the title of this blog entry. Psychosis (pl. psychoses): a severe mental disorder in which thought and emotions are so impaired that contact is lost with external reality.

It has nothing to do with what I’m about to talk about, except that the core of the word “psych” is also the core of the word psychic. “Psych” comes from the Greek psychikos, meaning “of the mind” or “mental.”

I’m going to see a psychic today.

I feel like both a skeptic and a wimp. Cool, man, cool (not)

I tried to think of other ways to phrase that, but the truth is? I’m feeling a little weird about it and don’t know what to expect. I’ve always had a tendency to research the paranormal, and in doing so have compiled the following facts that seem to be making me nervous.

01. My grandma is a pretty avid Christian and has mentioned to me before that seeking spiritual guidance of that nature is highly ill-advised. She basically conveyed the idea that reaching into the beyond without God was dangerous. Anything from tarot to Ouija to psychics– ex-nay.

02. My mother went with my aunt to see a psychic in Lilydale a few years ago. I remember them returning and detailing the visit for my grandma, cousin and I. Some pretty weird stuff was discussed: everything from the child Kathy must have miscarried to the possible future of Caitlin, to contact with my dead grandfather. Weird shit.

03. The Bible says that seeking mediums are not the way to go. The advice of a centuries-old book shouldn’t be discounted, should it? Granted it was mentioned in the Old Testament where there were hundreds of rules, but still. (Along with psychoanalysis and paranormal research, I’ve been interested in religion as well.)

04. Maybe I’m just a cynical skeptic when it comes to the whole “here let me tell you something about your life that I shouldn’t know at all, but I do” thing. That makes me feel vulnerable. Also, not in control.

05. Plus, I am pretty solidly in the “spirit world is real” camp. I realize that we’re blind to the actions of the ether, normally, but I think they’re there. Thankfully I’ve been blissfully unaware, mostly, thus far… can you imagine neurotic me, trying to live alongside ghosts and knowing it?

06. Also, to be brutally honest, I’m nervous. I’m nervous because even though I’m going with Sarah and her mother and they’ve done this before, who knows what I might learn. Apparently it’s this thing called “circles” where you pay ten dollars or so to sit in a circle with four or five other people. This psychic gives you (and here I’m quoting Sarah) “a mini reading.” I’ve never been to Lilydale and don’t know what to expect.

And here’s the kicker for me, I guess. I’ve never– never— been afraid of learning something. I’ve been afraid of many other things: death, sharks, deep water, slashers, stalkers, cannibals, fire, baby-killers and sadists. But never new knowledge.

I guess I’m just unnerved. What if I’m told I’ll suffer unspeakable tragedy soon? Or that my greatest worries will become reality? Or that on the way home some normal guy will suffer a psychotic break and steal Sarah and I for a fun couple years in his basement lined with human skin?

I just don’t know what I’ll be told, and I won’t have any control over it. I don’t like to be unaware of what I’ll face. So maybe I should be happy that whoever gives my “mini reading” might give me a heads-up… or maybe that five minutes will be the most terrifying five minutes of my life.

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4 responses

  1. I’m mostly of the same opinion as your grandmother / the Bible on this one. I probably wouldn’t ever go to a psychic. It seems like you’re having some mixed feelings about it. Remember that you don’t have to go. If you do go, just be safe. Also, I don’t believe most psychics, witches, tarot card readers, etc. have any real power. That’s not to say that none do.

  2. First off, we’re mediums, not psychics. Second, any reading, mini or otherwise, is designed to promote, uplift, advise, heal or any other positive action you can think of. Scaring the bejesus out of someone just isn’t done. Who ever is there and wants to be brought in, the medium brings them in. I’ve never seen a spirit come back out of evil. Be open, be brave, be yourself. It will be fine.

  3. It actually turned out more like a field trip than anything, to tell you guys the truth :) I went into serious thinking mode and was able to write about it and learn from the experience, which was definitely not the norm for me despite the many oddball things I like to research.

    PS @ bruether: I spoke with the daughter of a medium in Lily Dale and she informed me that there was only a minute difference between psychics and mediums: so perhaps it depends on the interpretation of the terms? I asked quite a few questions, and the differentiation between the two was one of them. If you have another opinion, I’d love to know it :)

  4. The source of the information is the biggest difference. The difference becomes even wider when talking about a psychic and a Spiritualist medium. Psychics have to prove nothing, only deliver information, thoughts, feelings, etc. A Spiritualist medium must prove the source of the message. Says the psychic, I see a trip in your future. Says the Spiritualist medium, your mother, Mary is here, will you will you take her message? She is showing me a trip in your future.
    See the difference?

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